#lasgen lirion kleoyia and legolas are siblings

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Legolas, staring into space: Sleeping is nice because you’re not actually dead and you’re not awake so its a win- win situation

Lasgen, nodding: It's like being dead without the commitment.

Lirion: an open relationship with death-

Kleoyia: death with benefits!

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

When light elves insult the dark elves for the nth time in front of legolas (and sis):

Light elf: -you’re such barbarians, i don’t understand why anyone would- what are you doing?

Legolas & kleoyia: *writing something on notepad*

Kleoyia: playing a game.

Legolas: i mean it’s always the same song and dance with you-

Kleoyia: “barabarians” “heritics” “idiots” “have no comprehensive of a ruling government” “dishonor on you! Dishonor on your family. Dishonor on your cow-“

Legolas: we’ve even made a game of it!

Kleoyia: *turns her notpad around to show a bingo square* Bingo! Everytime we have to interact with you light elves-

Legolas: we bring a bingo sheet with common insults you hurl at us and see who has bingo the fastest.

Kleoyia: it’s usually filled within 15 minutes.

Legolas: ironically the 2 squares that are almost never crossed off are “original insults” and “acusations of things we’ve actually done”

Kleoyia: we keep them in because it makes it interesting

Legolas: but really, do you never get tired of the same song and dance over and over and over again?

Kleoyia: at this point your insecurities and issues are easy to see

Legolas: it’s like going to a museum. “And over there is your superiority complex, over there is your self loathing, and over here is the crippling fear of being an outcast amongst your pears, so instead you make others the outcast!”

Kleoyia: “now if you follow me to exhibit b, we can see how these personal issues fuel violent and discriminatory actions against a people you’ve no understanding of just trying to live there lives”

Legolas: don’t you ever get tired of the constant hatred you spew?

Kleoyia: if i had the time and energy you have to spare to hate people that don’t even know you exist, i could probably solve world hunger.

Legolas: so why don’t you eat something and go to bed? You get cranky when you’re hungry.

Kleoyia: after all, babies need plenty of rest in order to grow into productive, esteemed members of society!

Light elf:......

Elladan and elrohir, who invited the sibs in the first place and watched all this go down: holy shit-

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Thranduil: *holding the shards of a vase* all right, who broke it? I’m not mad, i just want to know.

Lasgen, Lirion, Kleoyia, & Legolas: *not saying a thing because they’re ride or die, not snitches.*

Lasgen: .... it’s was ugly anyway.

Kleoyia: right? I’ve wanted to “accidentally” destroy it for years.

Legolas: I’m actually low-key upset we didn’t destroy it.

Lirion: we could have used it in a rage room. Would have had more value that way.

Thranduil: guys, really?

Cloudryad: *walks past* oh, that thing’s finally gone? About time.

Thranduil: *spluttering* MOM!

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Legolas: *goes to imlardis officially to announce that gollum has escaped, unofficialy to spy on the other elven haven now that they’ve gotten word via the trees that the ring has been found and a council called bc Akami knows those elves will conveniently forget to inform the silvans until sauron is at their front door* *sends a letter back to greenwood that reads: lmao brb; gotta go on a secret mission to destroy the ring so that we can kill Sauron once and for all, don’t wait up. Ps. If someone can do my paperwork that’d be great! Consider it a reward for going on such a dangerous quest 😁*

His siblings: that little shit, getting out of a year’s worth of paperwork!

Legolas, sending a second missive: 😝

His siblings: that little bitch-

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Arwen: so, why are you here? Not that i don’t enjoy your visits, but this was rather unexpected?

Legolas: i’m hiding out here because i accidentally destroyed a book belonging to one of my partners and i refuse to return until she’s not inclined to throw me off a cliff.

Elladan: that... was not what i was expecting.

Elrohir: can’t you just ask you family for help?

Legolas: *deadpan* when i asked Kleoyia, she said “LMAO, sucks to be you, bruh!” And left the room cackling like a witch.

Legolas: Lasgen looked at me with dead eyes from where she was seated surrounded by paperwork and told me to get out of her sight before she decided fratricide was a viable option.

Legolas: and i’m not entering my brother’s lab unless it’s the end of the world, i’d get used as an experiment.

Legolas: so no.

Arwen: what about your dad?

Legolas: that traitor would turn me in.

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

“Don’t ever fight someone” meme, but in my Thranduil & Miriel are twins au:

Don’t ever fight an ellon in a dress - there’s no way to win: Oropher

Don’t ever fight a dancer - it’s bullshit that such a flamboyant sport translates so well to physical violence: Legolas

Don’t ever fight somebody who’s smiling when you punch them - they’ve been waiting for that for a long time: Kleoyia

Don’t ever fight somebody who says “let me take a shot first” - they will never go down: Lirion

Don’t fight anybody from Lake Cuivienen - just... Don’t: Miriel

Don’t ever fight somebody around their wolf - they won’t need to lift a finger: Cloudryad

Don’t ever fight a trans man - they are way to excited to kick the fuck out of you: Thranduil

Don’t ever fight somebody who leans in when you tell them you want to fight - they’re about to murder you: Lasgen

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

I personally have legolas as part of a triad in my au and i just-

Sukanra (wife): *sensually dancing during a party bc she’s feeling sexy*

Iznake (husband): *blushing bright red and peeping through his fingers* i-im looking respectfully-

Legolas (husband): *blatantly staring and grinning* well, i’m looking disrespectfully. I’m looking carnally. I’m looking like a whore-

Sukanra: *smirks and beckons them closer*

Legolas, dragging Iznake with him: let’s go!

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Legolas, Lasgen, Kleoyia, and Lirion once had a competition to see who could wear heals the longest. The conditions were that they always had to wear the heals unless they were going to bed to sleep (they could not take the heels off for fighting, parkour, relaxing, or even s*x) and they would pick each other’s heals.

The competition lasted for over 30 years.

It’s shenanigans like these that keep these siblings from going insane over the many millennia that they live through.

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

For those of wyou who want a face to the names of Legolas's siblings in my AU

top left - Kleoyia, top right - Lirion, bottom left - Lasgen, bottom right - Legolas

Life gets interesting when none of you look alike because you're all half-siblings. the only reason Lasgen and Legolas look alike is because they took after Thranduil.

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Favorite music “genre” of legolas + siblings:

Lasgen: “the world’s ending but don’t worry darlin whether we live or die we’ll be fine” “fuck the system”

Lirion: “fuck the system” “if no one’s done it before, i’ll be the first”

Kleoyia: “fuck the system” “i’m gonna kick my ex’s ass”

Legolas: “fuck the system” “you only live once so enjoy it”

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Legolas and his siblings get kidnapped for ransom:

*Lasgen’s turn*

Kidnapper: we have your daughter.

Thranduil: no, you don’t.

Kidnapper:

Kidnapper: y-yes, we do.

Thranduil: no, you don’t. Have a good day. *hangs up phone*

Kidnapper: wh- *incoherent screaming*

————————————————-

*Lirion’s turn*

Kidnapper: take him back!

Thranduil, having just picked up the phone: no.

Kidnapper: please, he’s talking about how he would cut us open to see how our organs move!

Thranduil: well, maybe you shouldn’t have kidnapped him then.

Kidnapper: oh god, now he’s talking about genetically altering us so our children look like blob fish-

Thranduil: calm down, he hasn’t gotten to the stage where he’s threatening to go back in time and wipe your entire family line from existence yet. You have time.

Kidnapper: he’s going to what?!?

—————————————————

*Kleoyia’s turn*

Thranduil: *dials a number*

Kleoyia: *picks it up as she’s grabbing a knife* oh hey, ada!

Thranduil: a little birdy told me you had been kidnapped.

Kleoyia: that? Oh, yeah, but then i got bored and decided to switch our places.

Thranduil: ah, ok. Be home by dark and tell me what you’ve got out of them when you’re back.

Kleoyia: gotcha! *hangs up*

Kleoyia, pointing a knife at the tied up kidnappers who are crying: oh don’t cry, i have a feeling we’ll get to know each other very well.

—————————————————-

*Legolas’s turn*

Kidnapper: we have your son.

Thranduil: uhuh.

Kidnapper: we want-

Legolas: *muffled through the phone* Tell him i’m not filling out paperwork for getting kidnapped!

Kidnapper, to legolas: Hey! Shut it!

Legolas: oi! I’m not taking responsibility for your mistakes!

Kidnapper, to accomplice: i thought i told you to gag him!

Accomplice: i did!

Kidnapper: well clearly not good enough seeing as he’s still speaking! Now, THIS is how you gag some- where did he go?

Accomplish: *starts screaming*

Kidnapped: *SCREACHING* IT’S A GODDAMNED DEMON- WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!?!

Thranduil:

Thranduil: *hangs up* he’ll be fine.

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Heigh comparisons for the elves in my “pushing my miriel and thranduil are twins agenda” and “4 silvan sibs” au.

Cloudryad looks so small, but she’s one of the only ones to have a normal height.

Oropher is a tall boy, and only slightly shorter than his nephew elwe.

Miriel and thranduil are identical twins, except thranduil’s trans so of course they’re the same height.

Lasgen somehow being the exact height of her father was interesting.

Lirion got some of those oropher genes, though not enough to break 7ft.

Kleoyia’s still resonably tall for most people, but she’s on the shorter side of the family.

Legolas is eternally pissed for not only being the youngest but also the shortest of his siblings.

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

So (my au) legolas has big-ish family, right?

Like, obviously it’s not as big as it could be because it’s only 3 generations, as opposed to most elven families who have dozens of generations by the end of the 3rd age.

Anyways,

Legolas has 3 older siblings, his dad, and his grandma, who are all still alive and kicking in middle earth during the third age, but the only times they’re together is in greenwood. They are pretty much never in each other’s facinity outside of their forest, so while other beings and elves are subconsciously aware that legolas has a family, they’ve never met any of them, or realized that the ones they have met are 1 of legolas’s family members.

Literally the only reason any of the other elves realized legolas was thranduil’s son in the first place, despite having met him many times before, is because thranduil was like:

Thranduil: fuck. I have a meeting with the other elven leaders scheduled next week as an update meeting. I really don’t want to deal with it.

Legolas, the only one of his siblings currently in the palace: *minding his own business*

Thranduil: *yoinks legolas* fuck it, according to the noldor, in case the king can’t make it, the king’s kids can represent them.

Legolas, the poor unfortunate soul: *screeches as he’s unceremoniously grabbed and all but shoved in the direction of the meeting place*

Later:

Elrond: *confused why this elf is here and not the silvan king* legolas? Why are you here?

Legolas, a spitefull petty bitch: i am here to represent my father king Thranduil, as he is unavailable due to mourning his wife, who was killed in an attack several weeks ago.

Later:

Trans Thranduil, whose kids are all products of flings and has never had a wife, receiving condolence letters from other elven leaders: legolas, you little shit-

Lasgen, Lirion, and Kleoyia when they heard what legolas pulled: *cackles* *dying of laughter*

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

*The siblings are about to do something dangerous*

Kleoyia: Shouldn’t someone give a pep talk?

Legolas: Go ahead.

Kleoyia: Be careful.

Kleoyia: Don’t die.

Lasgen: *Holds back a laugh*

Lirion: Great. We’re all bloody inspired.

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Just a question, based on the last post you made, how many baby daddies does thranduil has and who are they?

No hate our anything I’m just curious.

Np, np!

My Thranduil (whose trans) sleeps around a lot (partially bc he was born at lake cuivinen and before marriage and chastity were really A Thing, and partially bc the silvans genuinely don’t care about one’s sex life as long as it’s consensual) and well, sometimes things happen and he gets pregnant.

He has 4 kids (significantly less than what he could have, but they all have different “spermdonors” as they’re usually referred to as) biologically and 1 adopted.

The eldest is Lasgen, a girl (and head of Mirkwood’s black ops/assassination unit). She was also born at lake cuivinen and Thranduil had her when he was 38 (teen parent) mostly bc at the time the elves were still trying to figure out things like “age of majority” and since thranduil and his sisters were the first elves ever born, no one really knew anything about children, childhood, when they’d be an adult, etc. Basically it’s a mess. She’s also the only one who they know who the sperm donor is (i’m sorry for bombarding you will all this lore of my au).

Her dad is Ingwe’s dad. And ingwe’s dad (Ingen) is a JACKASS who has a habit of ding-dong-ditching. (Knocking elves up and then, when they refuse to sibmit to him when they find out they’re pregnant, he abandons them to find another victim) let me put it like this: Ingen was the OG conservative. And naturally, he’s a shit father.

Which leads us to the next (and only adopted) child: Ingwe, who is 2 months younger than Lasgen. Long story short: Thranduil and his sister (Miriel in this au) basically babysat elflings (mainly the -we’s) and Ingwe’s mother (who’s friends with elwe and olwe’s mom) drops inwe off there, not knowing at first that her husband also knocked up thranduil. Basically: drama. Ingwe’s ma is also a bitch, she follows her husbands lead on everything. So when Ingwe was about 28 he disowned his bio parents and was formally adopted by Thranduil.

Skip all the way to the end first age/beginning second age and Thranduil gets pregnant again. No one knows who the other parent is. And, tbh, no one cares.

This child is Lirion. He’s the most stoic of all his siblings, but don’t let the deadpanned face fool you: he’s just as crazy as the rest of em. He’s a scientist who regularly breaks every law of physics he can get his hands on. Very curious with questionable morals

A thousand years later and Kleoyia is born. Again: no idea who the other parent is. The only clue they have is that her pupil is shaped like a diamond, indicating that she’s of ckeoticn’ar descent. This does not make knowing who the daddy is any easier. She’s the head of information gathering. Either through espionage, T&I, or other means. She travels all around middle earth constantly. She also, like her dad, sleeps around a lot. (Lasgen is gay, gay, homosexual, gay and has been married since the age of the trees, Lirion is Ace).

Last, but not least, our favorite: Legolas. He was born 2002 SA. Not a clue who the second parent is. He’s in a polyamorous relationship with his wife, Sukanra, and his husband, Iznake. He’s a fixer. Basically, when there’s smth going on that’s big enough to be important, but too small to have primary focus, he’s sent out to deal with it. Whether it’s diplomatic relations, scouting, battle, it doesn’t matter. He’s the jack of all trades. He also switches regularly between a male and female body.

The reason is bc he had 1 daughter SA 3007, and later on they wanted another kid but Sukanra did not want to give birth again so legolas went “if we can find away for me to be pregnant and give birth safely, i’m willing to do it” (w husband). In short, by the end of the 3rd age, Legolas is the only one of Thranduil’s kids to have kids (though the others do get kids later on down the line)

But yeah, 5 kids in total, 2 who know who the sperm donor is (and it’s a jackass) and 3 who are clueless but also don’t really care.

And all the baby-daddies are still lowkey interested in Thranduil (even jackass, though he’s still an asshat) and finding out that he had their kid and other elves’ kids ruffles their feathers a bit.

But Thranduil’s fine. He’s not that interested in having a partner, so the only reason he’s freaking out a bit is bc it’s a bit awkward to say “hey remember the time we hooked up millenia ago? Well -*plops a full grown elven warrior with a reputation in front of babydaddy* tada!”

Sorry for rambling! This was simply the perfect opportunity to info dump.

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

The thing about the Oropher & Cloudryad, Thranduil, Lasgen line up is that there isn’t even 50 between Oropher/Cloudryad and Lasgen, despite them being grandchild and grandparents respectively.

And that’d be fine if they were humans, but these are elves. 50 years becomes essentially worthless really fast.

Oropher and Cloudryad awoke 10 years before they had Thranduil and Miriel, and Thranduil had Lasgen when he was 38.

So the dynamic is rather interesting despite them being 3 generations.

In addition to the traditional parent/child dynamic, there’s also a strong friend/mutual respect as individuals happening between the 4 of them.

Bc in truth, no one can really pull seniority over each other, because there essentially is none. As a result, neither Oropher, Cloudryad, nor Thranduil weaponize “i am your father/mother” between them. Granted they don’t do it in general even with Lasgen’s siblings, but it’s especially notable between these 4.

Like with Lasgen’s siblings (Lirion, Kleoyia, and Legolas) there’s still over 4000 years between them and the 4, and that’s enough time to genuinely say “hey, i have more experience with xyz, so please listen to me”.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Furthermore, the dynamic between Lasgen, Lirion, Kleoyia, and Legolas is also rather interesting, because it’s a wierd mix between “x is significantly older than me, so i should listen to them” and “age doesn’t impact the dynamic at all”.

Lasgen was born at Lake cuivinen, Lirion was born somewhere around the time the 1st age became the 2nd age, Kleoyia was born a millenia after that, and Legolas was born a millenia after that.

So with at least a millenia between each sibling, there is a genuine experience gap between them. And it also means that each elf got “baby sibling/only sibling” treatment for a significant amount of time before the next sibling came.

And you’d think that, with all the older siblings being well into adulthood it’d mean that they aren’t close due to the age gap.

But that’s not what happened at all.

See, while they know and acknowledge where they stand in terms of experience, it doesn’t really impact or influence their dynamic.

Like yes, Legolas is the baby sibling, but that’s not his role in the dynamic of the 4. And Lasgen’s the eldest, but that isn’t why she’s in charge (she’s in charge bc she does not let anyone tell her what to do, it’s personality trait).

And to be fair, all 4 of them do not like being told what to do, regardless of who it is. So the dynamic between them can’t be related to “rank” or any such concepts, because that’ll just cause infighting.

Instead the dynamic is much closer to what you will find in close friends, though with extra platonic love in there.

It also helps that none of the 4 believe in the notion that “you’re too old to be doing something”. So none of them feel belittled when a sibling that’s younger than them asks them to help with something you can only get better at through experience.

Also, chaos in general is pretty standard at their home bc how else would they stay sane after thousands of years, so if they want to make a mold of their foot and poor melted candy into it to make a candy foot, you can’t stop them.